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    Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by  on Sat Feb 23, 2008 5:13 am

    Why did the burglar take a shower?
    He wanted to make a clean getaway!


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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by  on Sat Feb 23, 2008 5:13 am

    Lions, in the Park?
    Well, dandelions!


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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by  on Sat Feb 23, 2008 5:14 am

    Boy: mom, aaj mera dost ghar AA raha hai....ghar ke sab khilone Chhupa de. Mom: tera dost chor hai kya? Boy: nahin, who apne khilone pahechan lega.


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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by  on Sat Feb 23, 2008 5:18 am

    A boy went to meet his girl-Friend.When he came back at home mom asked: kahan gaye thay?
    .. Boy: Saba se milne
    Mom: ..Kiss liye?
    Boy: haan Bohat liye ... :-D


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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by  on Sat Feb 23, 2008 5:26 am

    aik dafa bakree ne apne piyarey se bachey ko kaha " me sadqay jaoon!!!!"
    bachey ne kaha " mama abhi baqarah aid nahi aye!!!!!"
    (yeh lateefa aik bachay ka ijaad kerda hai )


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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by  on Sat Feb 23, 2008 5:33 am

    ek dafa allama iqbal, banazir or nawaz sharif bhetay soch rahay thay,
    itnay mein banazir boli ke chalo cricket kheltay hian,
    ilama iqbal ne kaha ke kahan khelien gay,
    nwaz sarif apni tind per hath per kar kehta hai yahan ajoa pictch khali hia!!


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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by  on Sat Feb 23, 2008 5:34 am

    Shairni ne haathi k ghar se ayaa howa rishta tukra dia.....
    ..Q?
    ..
    ..r>..
    ..Yeh unk Ghar ka mamla hai..ap Apna kaam karien


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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by  on Sat Feb 23, 2008 5:39 am

    naani amma ne kaha k baita jub khaansi aya karey to munh k saamney haath rekh liya karo
    baitey ne kaha koi baat nahi naani maa mere daant aap ki terha naqli nahi!

    kitna ghaamar bacha ho ga. yeh bhi nahi pata k khansi k waqt haath is liye rekhte hain taake germs na spread hon


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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by  on Sat Feb 23, 2008 5:40 am

    Aik hathi ne chhonti se shadi ker li shadi k 4 din k baad hathi k death ho gae .....choonti bohat roye kehnay lagi uff meray Allah 4 din ka piar mila ab sari ummar kaber khodnay main lag jaye gi /................................HAHA


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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by  on Sat Feb 23, 2008 6:20 am

    Mubarak Ho,
    ..Msg na karne par aapko MBA ki digree di jaati hai..
    ..MBA means:MEMBER of Bhikaari ASSOCIATION
    ..Ab yeh msg aap dosre Bhikaari ko karain


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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by  on Sat Feb 23, 2008 6:20 am

    Ghalib ne apni girl friend ko date per bulaya wo late hogai, Girl: Am i late?
    ..Ghalib: Falak pe sitaro ko neend aarahi hai,Dosri ka time hogaya tu ab arahi hai.


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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by  on Sat Feb 23, 2008 6:21 am

    Sardarji calls Air India. "How long does it take to fly to Amritsar?" Just a sec," says the rep. Thank you." says the Sardarji and hangs up (He thought that it takes only one sec to fly to Amritsar).


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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by ((.fiz.)) on Wed Feb 27, 2008 6:38 pm

    Hmmmmmmmmm.... VERY VERY VERY FUNnnYY.. HISHAAM lol!

    BOHAT HE ZABARDAST WORK KYA HA APNE.

    MAZA AGAYA..

    KEEP IT UP JANI...
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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by  on Wed Feb 27, 2008 6:44 pm

    TAHNKOO JANI HUM HAI HI ISLIYE YAHAN PAY


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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by  on Wed Feb 27, 2008 7:19 pm

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    A Sarder goes into a store and sees a shiny object.
    He asks the clerk, "What is that shiny object?"
    The clerk replies, "That is a thermos flask."
    The Sarder then asks, "What does it do?"
    The clerk responds, "It keeps hot things hot and it keeps cold things cold."
    The Sarder says, "I'll take it!"
    The next day, he walks into work with his new thermos.
    His Sarder boss sees him and asks, "What is that shiny object with you?"
    He said, "It's a thermos flask."
    The boss then says, "What does it do?"
    He replies, "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold."
    The boss said, "Wow, what do you have in it?"
    The Sarder replies, "Two cups of coffee and a glass of cold drink."


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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by  on Wed Feb 27, 2008 7:19 pm

    Pakistan just got their new Chineses fighter planes and sent a squadron of pilots there for training.
    "Ok, this one is easy to fly", said the Chinese trainer, "Even you fools should be able to operate it! You press this button to go up, this one to go left and this one for turning right!"
    "But how do we come down?" asked Capt. Arfath Pasha.
    "Oh," said the Chinese "leave that to the Indian Air Force!"


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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by  on Wed Feb 27, 2008 7:20 pm

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    For three years, the young Pakistani had been taking his brief vacations at this country inn. The last time he'd finally managed an affair with the innkeeper's daughter. Looking forward to an exciting few days, he dragged his suitcase up the stairs of the inn, then stopped short. There sat his lover with an infant on her lap! "Helen, why didn't you write when you learned you were pregnant?" he cried."I would have rushed up here, we could have gotten married, and the baby would have my name!" "Well," she said, "When my folks found out about my condition, we sat up all night talkin' and talkin' and decided it would be better to have a bastard in the family than a Pakistani."


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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by  on Sun Mar 02, 2008 7:32 am

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    A Sardar, a Japanese and a Britisher were lost in the desert. They were driving around in a Jeep when it broke down. Because they had nothing else, they decided to each take a piece of the Jeep as they continued their journey.

    The Japanese took the radiator, the Britisher took the seat, and our Sardar took the door.

    After a while of walking the Britisher asked the Japanese "I'm confused, why did you bring the radiator?"
    The Japanese responded, "If I get thirsty, I can drink the fluid."

    Next our Pappaji asked the Britisher "Why did you bring the seat?"
    So the Britisher said "If I get tired,I am not going to sit on the sand. I can sit on this comfortable seat."

    Finally the Japanese asked our Hero why he had chosen the door.
    The Sardar quickly responded to this question, "Well, when it gets hot all I have to do is roll down the window."


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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by  on Sun Mar 02, 2008 7:32 am

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Santa Singh was traveling in a crowded bus. He was carrying the passport size photograph of his son (for college admission). Accidentally, the photograph fell down from his pocket. He started searching for it frantically & found it on the floor, below the ends of a woman's saree. He asked her "Can you lift that saree? I wanna take a photograph" The rest is history. He was beaten so badly that he had to be admitted to hospital.

    He was surprised to see Banta Singh on the bed next to him, in a worse condition. Banta explained what happened to him He had gone to a remote village to work. He finished late and missed the last bus. He couldn't find any hotel. So he approached a nearby house and asked the Owner whether he can stay there for the night.

    The Owner replied" I have 2 grown up daughters. Sorry, I can't allow you to stay".

    He approached the next house and asked whether he can stay there for the night. The Owner replied, "I have 3 grown up daughters. Sorry, I can't allow you to stay".

    He went to the next house and asked:" Do you have "grown up" Daughters?". The Owner asked, "WHY?????????" Banta replied, " I wanted to stay here for a night....." The rest.... you guess....


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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by  on Sun Mar 02, 2008 7:36 am

    There were 4 sardars in Mumbai. They decided to start a business.They had a lot of discussions on the type of business and finally decided to start a hotel.

    They selected the best of locations and cooks and built the hotel. The hotel was inaugrated and was awaiting its first customer. The sardars waited and waited but nobody turned up. The story was the same the next day. A week passed but noboby turned up.

    WHY ? - Bcos there was a sign at the entrance "Visitors not allowed."

    After the failure of their hotel they decided to start an auto garage. They bought the best of car servicing equipments and soon started the garage. The 4 sardars waited that day for the first car to arrive but no car entered their garage. They waited for one day, 2 days ,a week but no car came to their garage.

    WHY ? B'cos their garage was on the first floor.

    After this failure they decided to fall back on the good old taxi driving. They bought a new Premier Padmini running on CNG and began to look for passengers. They drew past Churchgate but nobody hailed their taxi. They went to Nariman point yet nobody hailed their taxi. They drove to Chatrapati Shivaji Terminus, even there nobody hailed their taxi. In desperation they kept on driving all around Mumbai but alas no one hailed their taxi.

    WHY ? B'cos all the four sardars were sitting in the taxi.

    All the 4 sardars were very disgusted with their naseeb and decided to push their taxi into the sea at Marine Lines. They started pushing their taxi. They pushed the whole day and were very exhausted but the taxi did not move even an inch. They decided to rest for the night and start the next day. The next day the story repeated itself. The taxi just wouldnt move. They pushed for a whole week but the taxi wouldnt budge.

    WHY ? B'cos two sardarjis were pushing from front and two from behind.


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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by  on Sun Mar 02, 2008 7:36 am

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    One Sardar came to Madras and wanted to do shopping in Burma bazaar. His Tamilian friend told the Sardar that the prices will be costly and hence asked him to bargain for half the price.

    Sardar went and asked the price of stereo for which the vendor told 2000 Rs.

    Sardar asked for Rs.1000.

    Vendor told he can give for Rs.1800 for which Sardar told no, only Rs.900.

    Vendor told ok, I will give it for Rs. 1500 Rs. for which Sardar bargained for Rs.750.

    It was going on like this when finally vendor out of irritation said he will give the Sardar the stereo free of cost

    "Our Sardar asked whether he will give two."


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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by  on Sun Mar 02, 2008 7:36 am

    Once a cruise ship carrying people from all the nations was going on a around the world' tour when it got grounded. The ship became slow and finally came to a grinding halt.

    Captain of the ship called an emergency meeting and told the passengers, "Friends, we are in trouble because of God's being angry with us. We need to give sacrifice and I need three people to sacrifice their life so that rest of us can be saved."

    All of them moved towards the Deck where a japanese came forward and shouted "Long live japan" and jumped into the sea.

    Then a Israeli jew stepped forward said "Hellulaja" and dived into the sea.

    After that no one came forward for few seconds while people stared at each other and suddenly out of nowhere a Pathan came forward near the railing and chanted,

    "Allah-u-Akbar"

    And Kicked the Indian standing next to him in the sea.


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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by  on Sun Mar 02, 2008 7:39 am

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    A Sardarji and an American are seated next to each other on a flight from Los Angeles to New York. The American asks if he would like to play a fun game.

    The Sardarji, tired, just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks.

    The American persists and explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun. He says, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me five dollars, and vice versa."

    Again, he declines and tries to get some sleep.

    The American, now agitated, says, "Okay, if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5,and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $500."

    This catches the Sardarji's attention and, figuring there will be no end to this torment, agrees to the game.

    The American asks the first question: "What's the distance from the earth to the moon?"

    The Sardarji doesn't say a word, reaches into his wallet,pulls out a $5.00 bill, and hands it to the American.

    "Okay," says the American, "your turn".

    He asks, "What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four legs?"

    The American, puzzled, takes out his laptop computer & searches all his preferences........no answer. He taps into the air phone with his modem and searches the Internet and the Library of Congress... no answer.

    Frustrated, he sends e-mails to all his friends and coworkers but to no avail.

    After an hour, he wakes the Sardarji and hands him $500.

    The Sardarji thanks him and turns back to get some more sleep.

    The American, who is more than a little miffed, stirs the Sardarji and asks, "Well, what's the answer?"

    Without a word, the Sardarji reaches into his purse,hands the american $5,and goes back to sleep.


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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by  on Sun Mar 02, 2008 7:40 am

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    A sardarji comes up to the Pakistan border on his bike. He's got two large bags over his shoulders.

    The guard Iqbal stops him and says, 'What's in the bags?' 'Sand,' answered the Sardarji.

    Iqbal says, 'We'll just see about that. Get off the bike.'

    Iqbal's guard takes the bags and rips them apart, he empties them out and finds nothing in them but sand. He detains the sardarji all night and has the sand analyzed, only to discover that there is nothing but pure sand in the bags. Iqbal releases the sardaji, puts the sand into new bags, hefts them onto the sardarji's shoulders, and lets him cross the border.

    A week later, the same thing happens. Iqbal asks, 'What have you got?' 'Sand,' says the Sardarji.

    Iqbal does his thorough examination and discovers that the bags contain nothing but sand. He gives the sand back to the Sardar, and crosses the border on his bike. This sequence of events is repeated every day for three years.

    Finally, the Sardarji doesn't show up one day and the guard, Iqbal, meets him in a 'Dhaba' in Islamabad.

    'Hey, Buddy,' says Iqbal, 'I know you are smuggling something. It's driving me crazy. It's all I think about...I can't sleep. Just between you and me, what are you smuggling?'

    The Sardaji, sips his Lassi and says, 'Bikes'


    _________________
    Kabhi Kisi Se Pyaar Mat Karna

    Ho Jaaye To Inkaar Mat Karna

    Nibha Sako To Chalna Uski Raah Par

    Varna Kisi Ki Zindagi Barbaad Mat Kerna

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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by  on Sun Mar 02, 2008 7:49 am

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Musharraf in Tunnel:

    Vajpayee, Musharraf, Madhuri Dixit and Margaret Thatcher are traveling in a train. The train suddenly goes through a tunnel and it gets completely dark. Suddenly there is a kissing sound and then a slap! The train comes out of the tunnel. Thatcher and Vajpayee are sitting there looking perplexed. Musharraf is bent over holding his face, which is red from an apparent slap. All of them remain diplomatic and nobody says anything.

    Thatcher is thinking: "These Pakistanis are all crazy after Madhuri. Musharraf must have tried to kiss her in the tunnel. Very proper that she slapped him"

    Madhuri is thinking: "Musharraf must have moved to kiss me, and kissed Margaret instead and got slapped."

    Musharraf is thinking: "Damn! it, Vajpayee must have tried to kiss Madhuri, she thought it was me and slapped! me."

    Vajpayee is thinking: "If this train goes through another tunnel, I could make another kissing sound and slap Musharraf again."


    _________________
    Kabhi Kisi Se Pyaar Mat Karna

    Ho Jaaye To Inkaar Mat Karna

    Nibha Sako To Chalna Uski Raah Par

    Varna Kisi Ki Zindagi Barbaad Mat Kerna

    ˙·٠●(-๑۩۞۩๑ ๑۩۞۩๑-)●٠·˙

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    Re: Jokezzz >>>>>>>>>>>

    Post by Sponsored content


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